So I went on 2 campus interviews that went extremely well, and now I'm just waiting to hear back (I was among the first to interview for both positions). The waiting is literally driving me insane. I am having trouble focusing on my actual work (I'm a postdoc) and the uncertainty is making me feel depressed 90% of the time. Am I alone in these terrible feelings?! How do y'all cope with this madness?!?! Our futures (and those of our families) are on the line!
AMEN
AMEN
AMEN!!!
I have been on the market three times (this year included). Each time I spiraled into an obsessive depression - feeling totally helpless yet completed compulsive in checking the wiki, tweaking my app materials just so, checking and rechecking my phone for new emails… And you are right, it is so compounded by the fact that it is my family (or rather, my ability to start a family) that is on the line - all the sense of responsibility without any control. It's so hard to ignore that nagging doubt but also it does nothing to focus on it.
All I can say is, time passes with or without us. Throw yourself into whatever you can to distract, even just for a few hours.
And for me, every time I have the urge to obsess and (inevitably) replay all the things I did "wrong" in the last interview/application (and who is to know if it actually makes any difference), I play this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYCp98McUc8
Alternatively, create a rule that you can only check your email and wiki once you finish a task on your to-do list. That helps me :)
I've been through this once before (successfully) and it was awful.
I'm doing it again. While I don't have as much on the line (I have a pretty good job), I obsessively check the wiki and my email.